Day 4 of 40 (Español abajo)
The following is an excerpt from "The Line Becomes a River" by former Border Patrol agent and UofA alum Francisco Cantú: "My mother asked about my shift. It was fine, I said. She asked if I was liking the work, if I was learning what I wanted. I knew what she was asking, but I didn't have the energy to think of it, to weigh where I was against what had brought me there. The work isn't really something to like, I told her curtly. There's not a lot of time to sit around and reflect on things. A slow look of resignation came across my mother's face... You know, my mother said, it's not just your safety I worry about. I know how a person can become lost in a job, how the soul can buckle when placed within a structure... I cut her off. I was too exhausted to consider my passion or sense of purpose, too afraid to tell my mother about the dreams of dead bodies and crumbling teeth, about the bird I had buried beneath stones, about my hands shaking at the wheel."
Día 4 de 40 "Mi madre me preguntó sobre mi turno. Estaba bien, le dije. Me preguntó si me gustaba el trabajo, si estaba aprendiendo lo que quería. Sabía lo que estaba preguntando, pero no tenía la energía para pensar en él. "El trabajo no es realmente algo que me guste,” le dije secamente. "No hay mucho tiempo para sentarse y reflexionar sobre las cosas." Se produjo una lenta mirada de resignación… Sabes, mi madre dijo, no me preocupa solo tu seguridad. Sé cómo una persona puede perderse en un trabajo, cómo el alma puede doblarse cuando se coloca dentro de una estructura… La corté. Estaba demasiado agotado para considerar mi pasión o sentido de propósito, demasiado temeroso de contarle a mi madre sobre los sueños de cadáveres y dientes rotos, sobre el pájaro que había enterrado debajo de las piedras, sobre mis manos temblando al volante.” (Cantú, Francisco. The Line Becomes a River. New York: Riverhead Books, 2018, p. 76)